Amy W: A Determined Mother
Happy Mother’s Day! My name is Amy W. I am 31-years old and a 2011 Gilgal graduate. I relapsed along the way and recently returned to Gilgal. I want to get it right and the difference this time is that I am a mother. God has blessed me with a beautiful four-year old daughter. Being here without her is one of the toughest things I have had to endure.
We, as mothers, are not meant to be away from our children. She recently learned how to write her name and I was not there to witness it. It is heart breaking to miss out on the new things she is learning. But, I am of no use to her unless I get the help I need, so, I am exactly where I need to be.
I recognize that it was my poor choices that put me back at Gilgal. We get an excellent foundation here. It is on each Gilgal girl to own her issues and put in place a plan to deal with them. I am back at Gilgal to restore everything I let the enemy steal from me. While I am doing this for myself, there is an innocent four-year old waiting on Mom to get it right and come back home. I think of her daily. My parents care for her while I am at Gilgal. I learned that grace is getting what we don’t deserve. I don’t deserve another chance or the unconditional love of my parents and of Jesus Christ. I am truly blessed to have grace in my life.
My mother and I have always been close. However, my drug use put a lot of stress on our relationship. I know I am supposed to honor my mother, but instead, I did the opposite. I am often sad because I hurt her for so many years. But, I am learning to forgive myself for what I put her through. I know God can and will heal the wounds. Our relationship is growing as I continue to get healthy. Mom and I are able to laugh together today. I am so grateful that she has forgiven me. Everyday I work toward bettering myself and becoming the woman God intended. It is a process, but I am determined to be the mother and daughter they both deserve.
I am excited to be able to spend this Mother’s Day with my daughter and mom. I appreciate your prayers for my family and me as I work on myself.